Many have been coming to me lately with relationship challenges. Relationships is one area that people often ask about but lately it seems even more so. As the old is moving out and the new is moving in, we are shifting and so are our relationships.

One client, Jamie, continually attracts unavailable men. Emotionally and physically unavailable, single and married men. This has been a source of great frustration for her as she says she is ready for a relationship and to share her life with someone. She is attractive, smart, successful, creative and fun. So why is she not manifesting this relationship she desires?

She came to me recently as she met a man and felt an immediate connection. She eventually finds out that he’s married with two small children and lives in a different state. Jamie was so frustrated because she really did feel a connection to this man yet he was once again, unavailable. She asked me why this keeps happening.

I suggested to her that these men are a reflection of her. She was attracting unavailable men because she wasn’t truly available. Jamie wasn’t truly open to having an intimate relationship with someone. She has been on great journey of self growth and has made huge progress. Yet, she still had fears that kept her closed off from others.

I told Jamie that she was being given a wonderful opportunity to see clearly where she is and to decide what she wants. The universe couldn’t have brought her a more unavailable man so she could see exactly where she is. She is attracting herself.

Although Jamie claimed she is ready for a relationship, her energy was putting out different signals to the universe. She was getting what her energy was saying wanted at that time. In this case, she was not open to an intimate relationship. It was time for her to get clear on what she truly wanted and to change her energy in order to manifest it.

For months I had been encouraging Jamie to get quiet for 10 minutes a day and sit with herself. To breathe, center her energies, connect with her heart center and with who she is. At the time of this latest relationship issue, she hadn’t been comfortable doing this. She even told me she was a little afraid of it. Bingo! Her fear of intimacy!

Jamie, like many, has a fear of letting someone in. A fear to let someone really see who she is. She is afraid to see her own self, hence her reluctance to sit quietly with herself. If she is uncomfortable with this kind of intimacy with herself, she won’t be open to it with another. We are all magnificent beings, with a pure essence of love and many gifts. Unfortunately it can be difficult for us to see who we truly are. This is what the journey of growth is about…. Connecting to the Divine within.

This current relationship experience for Jamie attracted gave her the chance to really see this fear of who she truly is and to address her fear of intimacy. Now, she sits quietly for a while every day, centers and connects. Jamie is beginning to understand that she really isn’t all that bad and may actually be pretty amazing. She has begun the healing process and is becoming more open to others. As a result, she will attract more available men with the potential of a meaningful and intimate relationship. More importantly, her relationship with her Self is better than ever.

Many of us can relate to Jamie’s story in one way or another. Look at the mirror the universe is offering you. See what it is you are attracting and decide what it is that you want. Sit quietly for just 10 minutes a day and connect with your breathe, your heart and with who you truly are. Watch the miracles happen in every area of your life!